A Moment in Time

One of my favorite writers, Malcolm Gladwell, popularized the phrase, “the tipping point.” It refers to that exact moment when adding one more thing – person, object or event – instantaneously changes a situation. Picture an old-fashioned scale, with equally weighted objects, teetering perfectly still. And then something lands onto one side of the scale, changing things irrevocably.

There’s a reason people identify tipping points in hindsight, something I’ve learned first-hand during this rehab process. I constantly wonder, even daily, whether I’ve turned the corner. I analyze each PT accomplishment, each step taken without pain, each time I bend my knee without difficulty, searching (and hoping) for signs that my knee’s normal again. However, it’s nearly impossible to pinpoint, in real-time, the exact instant a situation changes. Did things really change? Or was it a temporary aberration, with the moment flittering away before slowly returning to the status quo? Unfortunately, blaring trumpets don't materialize to announce the arrival of a tipping point.

I realize I haven’t reached the tipping point in my recovery. Not even close. While my gait has steadily improved, I still walk with a slight limp (though I no longer use my pimp cane). I don’t have full ROM. I can’t push off my gimpy leg to stand up. And if I’ve been on my feet for awhile, my weakened leg sometimes “gives out,” a brutal reminder that my knee is far from healed. But back in January when I was peeing in plastic bottles and showering with my leg encased in plastic garbage bags, I never envisioned I’d reach this point. I know I’ve got a long way to go – at least 9 more months – but for the first time I think I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

On a less serious note, my knee’s rounded because of the osteotomy. No pointy, bony knee cap juts out. When my leg’s bent, it resembles an amputee stump. Given the uselessness of my knee at times and the fact that the thickest part of my scar covers the 2 inches above my knee cap, that’s an apt comparison.